Thursday, May 7, 2015

Zoe vs. Nancy Drew

Last week was the 85th anniversary of the publication of the first Nancy Drew book. When I was a kid, I wished that I could be Nancy Drew. She was smart and pretty, relatively free from parental constraints, and she solved mysteries. What could be better?
Fast-forward thirty years and I’m now married and the mother of one little girl while Nancy Drew remains forever eighteen years old (and 100 pounds). But that doesn’t mean I can’t still learn from her.
Here are:

10 Lessons from Nancy Drew That Apply to Motherhood

1. Always break for lunch. Unless you want the people you’re responsible for to get cranky. Low blood sugar leads to sloppy thinking and sore feelings.
No need to get fancy. Though Nancy could certainly throw together an award-winning Bento box, she plays to her audience, and they want sandwiches. Crusts optional.

Whatever this was Timmy had shoved
up his nose, Nancy decided some
mysteries were best left unsolved.

2. Be prepared. Bring the extra sweater. Make sure there are batteries in the flashlight (and in the toys that light up). And opt for the sensible pumps; you’ll be on your feet a lot.

3. Anticipate calamity. Be ready to spring into action at a moment’s notice. The sound that roused you from slumber. The glass on the edge of the coffee table. You never know what accident is about to unfold before your eyes or behind your back.

4. Ask for help. Surround yourself with chums not bums.

5. Even if you don’t know what you’re doing, pretend that you do. You may not be good at everything (like a certain girl detective) but your charges believe you to be the smartest, most put-together human who can solve any mystery from "Why are we here?" to "Whose foot is this?"

6. Look for clues. Investigate. Don’t let fear stop you. No matter what stench greets you when you walk into their room, face up to it. That smell’s not going away until you deal with it.

7. Trust your intuition. Silence can sometimes cloak nefarious doings. Peer around corners so your quarry doesn’t notice you spying on them. Once they see you, they will stop what they are doing and you’ll never get to the bottom of what was making that suspicious noise.

8. Persevere. Sometimes you won’t be taken seriously, you may be doubted, but you must press on anyway no matter what others may say, even supposed authority figures, be they police chiefs, elderly churchgoers, or sanctimommies.
Remember: There is no perfect crime. A perpetrator will most likely drop something in their rush to evade justice.

9. Project outward calm. Keep those tears on the inside. Daily you will be faced with a person who believes they’re running the show, but you know better. Make sure they do.

10. Don’t forget to have fun. You are the pilot of your own destiny and a model for others. A little honey goes a long way.
Just not too much. High blood sugar is as dangerous as low blood sugar. Strike that balance. After all, it’s what Nancy Drew would do.

Zoe: 91; Universe: 0

For more of Zoe's hijinks, follow me on Facebook and on Twitter at @zoevsuniverse
I need a win here, people. 
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  1. Steph@DontChewGlassMay 7, 2015 at 11:22 AM

    I love Nancy Drew! I had no idea how much I had in common with her until now. ;)

  2. Elizabeth CatalanoMay 7, 2015 at 12:12 PM

    Ha, it is surprising, isn't it?

  3. I read a little Nancy Drew, but my favorite was Encyclopedia Brown. That boy was a genius!

  4. Elizabeth CatalanoMay 7, 2015 at 4:34 PM

    Ha! I liked him too. Best antagonist's name: Bugs Meany!

  5. Eighty- five years! No way. As a young girl, I dreamed I was her. I was always in awe of how she would whip extra things out she had packed that were perfect for what she needed to help out in a pinch. My oldest daughter loves her now and wants to be a CSI investigator when she grows up. Little too grisly for me, but.... Nancy has left her mark!

  6. I was so her as I walked to school and solved all of the nonexistent crime that was going on :) #4 is a HECK YES!!!! As you head into those teen years load up on the non judging girlfriends who have a boat load of humor and a taste for WINE!!!!


  7. Never read Nancy Drew... so I'll start with implementing your list ASAP.

  8. Elizabeth CatalanoMay 12, 2015 at 12:00 PM

    Stop being young near me! And go read some Nancy Drew.

  9. How is it possible that 85 years have passed? I loved Nancy Drew and I love the lessons you came up with. # 8 is my favorite because it is so true, always persevere because the guilty will always be revealed.

  10. Elizabeth CatalanoMay 24, 2015 at 7:13 AM

    Thanks! She was my childhood idol. Glad you enjoyed!