Zoe vs. the Middle School Dance at Blog U

The Middle School Dance. Otherwise known as the trial by fire for the socially awkward. This past weekend I went to Blog U in Baltimore and one of the highlights---or horrible reminders of my childhood (six of one)---was the Middle School Dance sponsored by Nickelodeon.

Remember when Susie's water broke
at the church social in 7th grade?

It brought me right back to being thirteen years old and going to a dance in the school basement. How I'd cling to the edges of the dance floor and, because it was safer out where conversation wasn't expected, I would keep dancing, no matter how sweaty or tired I became, no matter how many times they played Rockwell's "I Always Feel Like (Somebody's Watching Me)." Whoa-oh-oh-oh.

Of course no one was watching me. Which was good because I hate attention.

And yet . . .

We all need validation, or at least a sense of belonging.

One of the main themes at the conference this weekend was finding your tribe. Hard if you're not really a tribal sort.

Or if you avoid attention.

Or if you have this issue when you're talking to people where you become hyper aware of your face and feel like it's growing until it seems like it might explode and then face will get all over everyone's clothes. It's very hard to get face out of silk.

Imaginary exploding face issues aside, I'm so glad I went. I learned a lot, even if one of those things was realizing I may never even make lunch money from blogging. I may never do a sponsored post or be a brand ambassador. Because that wouldn't feel authentic for me. Though, I will say that the myCharge portable charger we received as part of our swag is truly awesome.

Should I ask them to pay me for that sentence?

Too late.

Though maybe I could structure a whole post about the myCharge Energy Shot and get all metaphoric, like how a device to recharge my phone reminded me of myself and how in social situations I need time by myself to recharge my mental energy. Maybe I'd even write them a haiku.

Dearest myCharge, you

get me, you really do, you

beautiful bastard

Also after Blog U I now want to drop the phrase "up sell" into every conversation thanks to Julie Nowell's inspiring session on Collaborative Blogging. Though when she first said "up sell" my brain went all Dr. Seuss: "Up sell, down sell, hard sell, soft sell." Soft Cell? Wait a minute, Nickelodeon didn't play "Tainted Love" at the dance!

And so we've circled the periphery of the dance floor, maintaining our chill expression the whole time, and now we're back at the beginning.

Nickelodeon did an outstanding job. Just the right mix of music and antics for a group of mostly women, most in their thirties or forties, many of them moms, many of those with surprisingly flat stomachs (which frankly felt like a personal betrayal! Seriously, fellow moms, cut it out!), who were self-aware enough to give in to memories of our own lameness but wise enough to embrace it, not care, and dance.

Linda Roy from Elleroy Was Here
channeling Mary Katherine Gallagher,
noted Superstar

I don't know if Zoe will grow up to be as awkward as her mom. Right now she loves a good party; you can always find her in the middle of the action. And since she's come into my life, I've noticed she pulls me out into the world more than I've ever been before. And when I am out there, people don't even seem to notice that giant goiter on my neck swelling up till it might explode if you poke it. Don't poke it!

Overall, at Blog U, I learned a lot, got out of my comfort zone, and met several like-minded people, whom I'll enjoy getting to know in my own slow way. Meanwhile, when I'm not craving complete solitude, I'm just happy spending time with the two main members of my tribe.

My tribe

Zoe: 96; Universe: 0

For more of Zoe's hijinks, follow me on Facebook and on Twitter at @zoevsuniverse. 

I need a win here, people. 

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