Thursday, September 3, 2015

Zoe vs. Some Truly Terrible Knock Knock Jokes

"You're supposed to laugh, Mommy," Zoe says.
"But what if I don't think it's funny?" I say.
"You have to laugh."
Can't argue with that. Especially since, as the Husband tells me, she inherited her waiting-for-a-laugh look from me. (Are you laughing at this? Then why can't I hear you?)
This week she's been obsessed with knock knock jokes---one of the lowest forms of comedy---and apparently she believes the funny resides in the format itself, not the words you actually choose.

Here are three examples:

1. The Ubiquitous Booty Butt Joke
Zoe: Knock knock.
Me: Who's there?
Zoe: Booty
Me: Booty who?
Zoe: Butt (collapses in laughter)

2. The Situational Awareness Joke, aka What's in This Room? 
Zoe: Knock knock
Me: Who's there?
Zoe (looking around bathroom): Soap
Me: Soap who?
Zoe: (looking around again): Cup (collapses in laughter)

3. The Random
Zoe: Knock knock
Me: Who's there?
Zoe: Lion
Me: Lion who?
Zoe: Lion (collapses in laughter)
Me: . . .
Zoe: Laugh!
Me (nervously): Ha ha.

Now it's my turn to order you to, I mean, make you laugh. Here are some humorous essays of mine from around the web. Enjoy! (Or else.)

From In the Powder Room: 


From Hahas for Hoohahs:

I read them to Zoe. She didn't even crack a smile.

Zoe: 107; Universe: a very humorless 0

For more of Zoe's hijinks, follow me on Facebook and on Twitter at @zoevsuniverse
I need a win here, people. 

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